Did I Really Just Watch Jersey Shore?


Jersey Shore

I’ve known about the Jersey Shore for a very long time but I never had the desire to watch it. Somehow I felt very left out. Every Thursday night my friends on Facebook would announce that they were settling in to watch Jersey Shore. Every family dinner I went to my brothers would talk about Snooki and how she sunk to a new low. Well get ready for it because I finally watched what I consider to be the biggest train wreck on television.

I happened to catch the episode that focused on Snooki having some sort of a UTI which is a urinary tract infection. I think I sat there with my mouth open the entire time. Do these people really get paid to act like fools on TV? Did Snooki just get paid to act like an animal and pee on the balcony in the corner? Did someone really announce that they don’t wash their hands after going to the bathroom? How can they not be ashamed after watching their antics on television? I’m guessing it’s because they get paid big bucks to hit rock bottom.

The cast of Jersey Shore has a huge fan following and has even created their own slang such as:

Creep : To seek out a potential hook-up, preferably one who is under the influence of alcohol

Fist pump : A dance move used to show excitement at clubs

Fred Flintstone toe : A term never to be used to describe a woman’s big toe

Grenade : A less attractive girl on whom one has to throw one’s wingman to prevent her from exploding one’s good time with her hot friend

GTL : An acronym that stands for the daily beauty regimen of going to the gym, tanning and doing laundry

Heated : Fired-up, angry; often as a precursor to fighting

Juiced : Extremely built or muscular, often through the use of steroids

Pouf : A hairdo in which a large mountain of hair is piled on the crown of the head

Pound it out : To engage in sexual relations

Robbery : The act of stealing another male’s most recent female conquest

Smush : To engage in sexual relations

Vibe : To be attracted to another person

They use tons of hair gel, go tanning, go to the gym and do laundry every day (I’m glad they do some sort of household chore) and party to the break of dawn at the clubs after which the guys bring some random girl home and call her a cab usually right after or in the morning.

Even when they aren’t doing their thing on Jersey Shore they create attention for themselves by doing strange things like Snooki carrying toy dolls around in public to prepare for motherhood.

To me this show is most likely one of the nastiest shows I’ve seen on TV. I’m not quite sure how long they can keep up this charade. I’m hoping they’ll one day settle down and get normal jobs instead of acting like they belong in a traveling circus  for everyone to laugh at. I don’t think that people are tuning in to this show because of quality (unless I’m somehow wrong about the human race as we know it) I think they’re tuning in to laugh at the train wreck that is their lives!!

Cast:

Deena Nicole Cortese as Deena

Jennifer Farley : “JWoww”

Michael Sorrentino :  “The Situation”

Nicole Polizzi : “Snooki”

Paul DelVecchio : “Pauly D”

Ronnie Ortiz-Magro

Samantha Giancola: “Sammi Sweetheart”

Vinny Guadagnino

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